The Covenant of Marriage

“Therefore what God has joined together, let not man separate.”
—Matthew 19:6 NKJV

Today, my wife and I celebrate 29 years of marriage. It is a wonderful marriage—one I would not trade for anything in this world. But like every marriage, ours has experienced struggles, disagreements, and difficult seasons.

Marriage is not merely a contractual obligation; it is a sacred covenant made before God.

A contract is often based on what each person receives. If one party fails to meet expectations, the other looks for a way out. A covenant is different. A covenant says, “I am committed to you through the good times and the difficult ones. I will remain faithful even when this requires sacrifice.”

When Christ is the foundation of a marriage, He guides us through the difficult seasons. The Holy Spirit gives us wisdom, understanding, patience, and strength. He reminds us of the promises we made and helps us love when our feelings are weak. He reminds us that quitting simply because marriage has become difficult is not the answer.

Marriage should never be entered into lightly or on a whim. Before making that covenant, you must understand that you are committing yourself to the person with whom you intend to spend the rest of your life.

Unfortunately, our culture often treats marriage like purchasing a house: when we no longer like it, we simply move on and look for another one. Man has made divorce relatively easy, but legal permission does not necessarily equal biblical permission. God takes the marriage covenant seriously, and so should we.

Imagine if God treated His covenant with us the way people sometimes treat marriage. What if He looked at our mistakes, failures, disobedience, and difficult seasons and simply said, “I don’t want to do this anymore”? Where would we be if God abandoned us every time we disappointed Him?

Thankfully, God remains faithful.

I cannot imagine my life without God, and I cannot imagine my life without my wife. Do I always do the right thing? No. Do I always say the right thing? No. Do I always treat my wife exactly as she deserves to be treated? No—and for those times, I ask God and my wife for forgiveness.

But I do not give up, and neither does she.

We remain beside one another through the good times and the bad times—when we see eye to eye and when we are not only on different pages but seemingly in entirely different libraries.

My aunt once gave me some honest advice about marriage. She said, “Sometimes you will wake up, look at that person, and ask, ‘Lord, what did I ever see in them?’ That feeling may last a day, or it may last a week. But stay committed long enough, and they will eventually remind you why you fell in love with them.”

Feelings change. Circumstances change. People experience hardship, grief, stress, sickness, and personal struggles. But covenant love remains committed through the changing seasons.

Marriage does not mean ignoring genuine danger or excusing abuse. Wisdom, safety, accountability, and biblical counsel may be necessary. But ordinary disagreements, difficult seasons, fading emotions, and unmet expectations are not reasons to casually abandon the covenant.

If you are married, fight for your marriage. Pray together. Forgive one another. Speak gently. Seek godly counsel. Remember the promises you made before God. If your spouse is experiencing a difficult season, do not turn your back simply because loving them has become inconvenient.

If you are considering marriage, do not enter it lightly. Understand that you are making a covenant—not merely signing a contract.

There may be days when you want to walk away. There may be seasons when you wonder if things will ever improve. But do not allow a temporary season to destroy a lifelong covenant. Lean on Christ, listen to the Holy Spirit, and remember why you chose one another.

Stick together. Pray together. Fight for one another—not against one another.

God does not turn His back on us during our difficult seasons. May our marriages reflect that same faithful, patient, enduring love.

“Though one may be overpowered by another, two can withstand him. And a threefold cord is not quickly broken.”
—Ecclesiastes 4:12 NKJV

Prayer

Father God, thank You for the sacred covenant of marriage. Thank You for sustaining my wife and me throughout these 29 years. Thank You for every joyful memory, every lesson learned, and every difficult season through which You carried us.

Help us to continue placing Christ at the center of our marriage. Teach us to love one another with patience, humility, grace, and forgiveness. Strengthen every marriage that is struggling today. Remind husbands and wives of the covenant they made before You, and give them the strength to keep fighting for one another.

May our marriages reflect Your faithful and enduring love.

In Jesus’ mighty name, amen.

Happy 29th anniversary to my beautiful wife. I love you, and I thank God for every year He has given us together.

—Rev. Carlos Figueroa
TheFreeBible.org